When life is difficult, it’s easy to focus on our trials and not on our blessings. This week I’ve learned that four people I love are dying with cancer, and I’ve needed time to grieve and pray. My husband’s brother, two of my dearest friends, and my half-brother are all suffering terribly right now. I’ve felt too sad to write until now.
Now, I’ve lost a number of loved ones to cancer (and other things) before—but not this many at one time. I am devastated. My girlfriend Diane (not Ford’s wife, but another Diane) has had ovarian cancer return with a vengeance, and she has two teen-age sons. Diane has been like a sister to me, and Ford is like a brother to me. It's SO hard to see them suffer, and also it’s also painful to see family members losing their battle with such a formidable foe.
The words of Peyton Conway March have comforted me, “There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life -- happiness, freedom, and peace of mind -- are always attained by giving them to someone else.”
This week I’ve had to reach deep down inside to find the strength to help others. It’s feels easier to grieve my own losses and forget the needs of others, but serving—even in small ways—has brought me peace. Writing emails has been a fun thing to do. Diane is on a respirator, but she loves to read emails. Visiting with Ford and his wife and been such a joy and a precious blessing. Praying for my friends and family members has been a privilege.
Amid all the sorrow and grief, my son David is starting to feel better after being very ill for five months. Thanks, Kaylana, for praying for my son. What a sweet gift you gave to me, a total stranger.
I love the Old Testament descriptions of God. In Genesis, He is referred to as Yahweh Jireh, meaning the Lord provides. In Exodus, He is called Yahweh Rophe or the Lord who heals. We may never experience physical healing in this life, but the Lord can comfort us and heal our broken hearts. Today, allow Him to comfort you. Allow yourself to receive the compassion that He feels for you personally. Mediate on His pure and perfect love and let Him encircle you in His arms.
© Carol Brown