Simple Ways to Find Peace

This week I'm teaching a class on finding peace during the holidays. This quote describes how we can keep peace in our hearts not only during the Christmas season but throughout each day of the year:

"THIS CHRISTMAS, mend a quarrel. Seek out a forgotten friend. Dismiss suspicion, and replace it with trust. Write a love letter. Share some treasure. Give a soft answer. Encourage youth. Manifest your loyalty in word and deed. Keep a promise. Find the time. Forgo a grudge. Forgive an enemy. Listen. Apologize if you were wrong. Try to understand. Flout envy. Examine your demands on others. Think first of someone else. Appreciate. Be kind; be gentle. Laugh a little. Laugh a little more. Deserve confidence. Take up arms against malice. Decry complacency. Express your gratitude. Go to church. Welcome a stranger. Gladden the heart of a child. Take pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the earth. Speak your love. Speak it again. Speak it still once again."


The Editors of McCall's, December, 1959

Laughter Is Really Good Medicine

Most of us could probably laugh a little more. Childlike laughter (not the mean, raucous kind) is good for us medically, psychologically, and spiritually. Scientists have shown it can help to cure disease, depression, and discouragement.

I plead guilty. I don't laugh nearly enough, but I am laughing more. I find children are natural comedians. Spend time with children and either their antics or their innocent comments will lighten your heart. Last week I asked my grandson what his favorite summer memory was, and he said, "Spending time with you, Grandma." Now, He's done a lot of really fun things this summer, and I expected him to say that his fun camping trip with his family was his favorite memory. Duncan and I have enjoyed simple things like feeding ducks, playing board games, looking at clouds, watching game shows, sharing secrets, and even weeding. We've laughed a lot together and perhaps that's why we've had SO much fun.

I love watching our new granddaughter, Chloe. She's a hoot! She squeals with delight when we play peek-a-boo with her, when we nuzzle her neck, or kiss her cheeks. Oh, how she enjoys life and makes us laugh.

My friend Diane always makes me laugh. Now, her husband, Ford, is fighting cancer big-time, but we never spend time together where we don't end up laughing about something like crazy hospital mix-ups or awful chemo reactions. We can choose to laugh or cry about things, and although we do some of both, we usually end up laughing in the end. (I posted about them earlier; it's the April 24th post.)

Liv, in her awesome blog A Year of Beauty just wrote:

When was the last time
you looked in a mirror
and nearly burst with excitement
at the sight of your own reflection?
Probably when you were little.

I love watching my kids
stare into a mirror,
always fascinated and delighted
to see themselves smiling back.
Their eyes sparkle,
their bodies bounce with joy,
their beautiful spirits shine through.

But when grown-ups look in the mirror
we immediately notice what's wrong,
conditioned to focus on what's flawed
versus what's fabulous.
Wouldn't you love
to sparkle and shine again?
Challenge yourself to fall back in love
with your reflection.

Start simple:
smile at yourself
before walking away from any mirror.
Give yourself a big toothy grin!

Then, work your way up to
sustaining that pose,
thinking only good thoughts about
that beaming, happy face of yours,
for a full five seconds.
Sounds short,
but it feels like an eternity
if you're used to only finding flaws.

When you've got five seconds mastered,
look yourself in the eyes
and recite a short and sweet affirmation
like these:

I am beautiful and the whole world sees it!

I feel good about who I am and how I look!

I am happy, healthy and love being me!

Yep, I know it sounds totally cheesy.
But what do you have to lose?
If you take this challenge seriously,
I am willing to bet
you'll start to notice a difference
in how you see yourself,
how you treat yourself,
and how others treat you.

Loving what you see in the mirror
isn't childish or conceited;
it's required if you want to become
the best and brightest you possible.
You look maaah-velous.
Believe it!

Thanks, Liv. (I'd send you a link to her post, but I can't figure out how to do it. Sorry! I'm still a novice blogger.)

Today, find ways to lighten up and laugh a little. Yesterday, because I'm on the terrorist list (yeah, that's right, I'm one scary dude), I was held up in security for 45 minutes at the airport and almost missed my flight. It didn't seem too funny at the time, but right now I think it's hilarious. I must look like one dangerous grandma!

© Carol Brown

Laughter Is the Best Medicine

Today my 13-year old granddaughter, Katie, was playing with her 6-month old sister, Chloe. A simple peek-a-boo game elicted belly laughs from Chloe. All of us in the car were laughing as we listened to Chloe squeal and giggle with delight.

Scientists and philosophers both know that one of the fastest ways to find peace amid sorrow is to laugh. Laughter is healing, therapeutic, and enlivening. Scientists have discovered that mirthful laughter released two healing hormones: beta-endorphins, which elevate mood, and human growth hormone, which strengthens the immune system. Laughter also decreases three harmful stress hormones: cortisol, epinephrine, and dopac.

Norman Cousins, who was diagnosed with a severe auto-immune disease in the 1970's, decided to fight his disease with laughter. He watched lots of funny movies and hilarious television shows and eventually his disease went into remission. He wrote a book about his experience, Anatomy of an Illness: A Patient's Perspective, which became a best seller and started a new field of medical research and care, known as integrative medicine.

In the Koran, we read, "He deserves Paradise who makes his companions laugh." King Solomon knew the the value of laughter. Almost three thousand years ago, he wrote, "A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." Nietzche said, “Perhaps I know best why it is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter.”

Mirthful laughter--which is pure and peaceable--brings joy to the one who is laughing and to those who share in the laughter. Laughter eases grief, mends broken hearts, and binds up wounded souls. Bob Newhart said, "Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on."

Today take a few minutes and enjoy a laugh or two.

© Carol Brown

Four Blessings from Beth

Over 30 years ago, Beth, her husband, and two daughters moved into a home across the street from ours. Beautiful, smart, witty, and wise, Beth savored life, lived happily, and loved purely. She faced adversity with faith and courage, and she blessed my life by her example.

When cancer destroyed the nerves in her spinal column after the birth of her second daughter, Beth became a paraplegic. During the 27 years that followed, she faced daunting health challenges. She often spent a month or two in the hospital each year, laying on her stomach after surgery. Other times, complications from her illness resulted in weeks of laying patiently while she waited for her body to heal. As I watched Beth endure great suffering, she taught me some secrets of peaceful living. Among them are:

1. Find beauty. When Beth lay in the hospital--too weak to read, visit, or watch t.v.--she observed shadows move across the room. An artist, Beth found beauty in the shading, form, and texture of the shadows. She found beauty on all of God's creations, even ones we may not notice.

2. Learn to laugh. Beth laughed at herself, her condition, and the ironies of life. She loved my children and laughed at their antics. She laughed when we watched videos together in her bedroom, when she talked about her hospital escapades, and when we visited over the phone. Laughter prolonged her life, and lessened her pain.

3. Serve someone. Beth found creative ways to serve others. She taught my older daughter to sew. She tended my younger daughter after school when I worked. She cooked gourmet lunches for her friends, created gorgeous Christmas tree ornaments for her loved ones, and designed an exquisite counted cross-stitch masterpiece for me, which read, "The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or touched. They must be felt with the heart."

4. See the positive. Beth reminded me that all of us face disabilities of one form or another. Some cannot walk, see, or hear. Others cannot trust God, forgive, or love. Beth said she preferred the former disabilities because she could still live with faith and optimism even though she could not walk. Beth focused on the beauties and blessings of life and overlooked the disappointments and heartaches.

Today Beth's spirit soars. She is walking and running among the angels. I praise God for the blessing of knowing and loving her and for the privilege of being her friend.
© Carol Brown