Eight Ways to Find Peace during the Holidays (and throughout the coming year)

At this time of year when we celebrate the life of the Prince of Peace, it is easy to lose our peace of mind when we are bombarded by advertisements, materialism, and unrealistic expectations. A few simple tips can make the Holidays happier and less stressful:

Serve someone. As we reach out to those in need, we experience the peace and good will. Service can be as simple as an anonymous gift, a thank you card, or a cheerful phone call. Whenever we bless the life of another, we allow God’s love to radiate through us to one of His precious children, and that love fills our hearts with peace.

Share a smile. We when smile to family, friends, and strangers, we discover that we feel more peaceful. As you smile, you can say a silent prayer, asking God to bless those you encounter with His love and protection.

Savor your blessings. As we reflect upon the countless gifts we enjoy, we realize that we have enough. We do not need presents, material possessions, or stuff to define or validate us. God’s love gives us the greatest gift of all: peace beyond anything that we can understand.

Seek God. God promises us that when we seek Him, we will find Him, and finding Him creates peace in our lives. How do we seek God? By becoming acquainted with Him through prayer and Scripture study, by trying to live as He lived and serve as He served, by thinking about Him, loving Him, and remembering Him. You are His children created in His image. As we seek Him, He teaches us that He loves us with an infinite love, and that is the path to peace.

Search out someone who needs your love. So many people need your one-of-a –kind love. It may be a widow down the street, your next-door neighbor, a coworker, or friend. It may be someone who seems difficult to love. Ask God to show you whom He wants you to love and how to love them. He will help you know what you can do to lift another, and as you do that, you will find that you are lifted as well.

Show kindness. Kind words and deeds are manifestations of God’s love. They bind up broken hearts, ease troubled minds, and heal wounded souls. When we speak with kindness, we do not criticize, condemn, or judge others. Instead, we celebrate the strengths and gifts that we see in one another, including ourselves. We share words of encouragement, gratitude, and compassion with others, and we also do the same for ourselves.

Simplify. As we celebrate the birth of our Savior, we remember He lived a simple life. As we focus on those things that matter most—relationships, love, and spirituality—we discover that Christmas does not come from a store. It is found within the recesses of loving hearts everywhere.

Surrender to a Higher Power. When I was nineteen, my father died, and I was left alone to navigate the challenges of life. I was an only child, and my mother was very ill and poor. I had no one I could turn to for solace and guidance—no one, that is, but God. I surrendered my financial, academic, and health challenges to Him. I gave my life to Him and discovered that as I did, He gave me His wisdom, comfort, and perfect love. My life has never been the same.

As we give our hearts to God, He gives us hearts filled with peace and comfort. When life is difficult, He strengthens us. When our hearts are broken, He waits to heal them. When our burdens seem too heavy to bear, He waits to carry them. All we have to do is ask in faith, trusting that He will answer our prayers in the manner and season that is right for us.

May you be enfolded in the arms of God’s love during the Holiday season and throughout the coming year, and may you radiate that love to others.

















© Carol Brown

Selfishness, Selflessness and Self-compassion

We experience peace when we learn to fully love ourselves so that we can then radiate that love to others. When we care only about achieving, earning, or having more than others, we do not find true peace. When are not content when we are either comparing ourselves with those whom we believe are above us or ridiculing those whom we consider beneath us. Selfishness does not promotes genuine serenity for true love gives as well as receives love.

Although helping and serving others can provide peace, if we love others instead of loving ourselves we can become dependent on others for our happiness instead of trusting in God as the Source of all peace and joy. The account of the Prodigal Son describes a father who loved his son perfectly without becoming codependent on his son for his own happiness. When the son rebelled from his father, the father allowed the son to suffer the consequences for his unwise decisions yet enthusiastically welcomed his son back after the son repented and returned. If the father had tried to rescue his son, his son would not have learned from his bad choices. If the father had been consumed with self-loathing because of his son's self-defeating choices, he might have lacked the strength to forgive his repentent child and receive him when he returned. When we become obsessively selfless, we may be effective at giving love but not at receiving it.

When we trust completely in God, we allow Him to fill our hearts with peace even when life is difficult and unfair. When we feast on God's infinite love for us, we can then give and receive His love freely. Self-compassion, a gift from God, enhances our ability to love ourselves and to love others. We learn to love ourselves because God first loved us. Then, filled with His love, we can love others in healthy ways that promote happiness and peace.

© Carol Brown

How to Experience Peace of Mind

The thoughts we choose determine whether or not we experience peace. We have the power to choose thoughts of fear or thoughts of love. As we monitor our thoughts, we can decide to eliminate negative, toxic thoughts and replace them with peace-filled, healing ones. This is one of the greatest powers we possess, for our thoughts determine the words we speak and the actions we perform. We are what we think.

As we monitor our thoughts, we become observers and managers of them. We then can choose to eliminate negative thoughts before that overwhelm us and replace them with positive ones. For example, if I find myself criticizing a situation or person, I replace those judgmental thoughts with loving ones. I pray for those whom I have allowed to offend me. I look for the strengths in others, rather than weaknesses. I celebrate the divine in everyone I meet, remembering that we are all children of God, who loves us with immeasurable love.

Just like it's easier to pull a weed when it's small, it's easier to remove negative thought patterns when they first begin. If you find that toxic or unpleasant thoughts are disturbing your peace of mind, replace them with thoughts of gratitude and love. I have learned that when we foster loving thoughts, it dispells our fearful ones.

In his book Anatomy of the Soul, Dr. Curt Thompson shows have we can rewire our minds by transforming our thinking patterns. A psychiatrist, Dr. Thompson shares many ideas that help us do that. Here are a few of them:

Meditation "The practice of meditation....puts us in position to be open to God's search of us. It enables us to be aware of our bodies and how God may be speaking to us through them." Psalms 119 says, "I meditate on your precepts and consider yours ways....Cause me to understand the way of your precepts, that I may meditate on your wonderful deeds."

Prayer "Meditation naturally leads to prayer. Paul admonishes us to be devoted to prayer (Colossians 4:2); not only should we long to pray, we should be aware that it, too, will require hard work....Prayer in turn leads us, like the psalmist, to answer God with our prayers of petition and praise as we become aware of the depth of his love and beauty."

Fasting Dr. Thompson says that fasting "puts us deeply in touch with our bodies" and helps us realize how often we use food to "shut off distressing emotion triggered by implicit memories."

Study Dr. Thompson suggests that keeping a written prayer and reflection journal is helpful, along with enjoying the beauties of nature and various expressions of art.

As we pray, meditate, study, and serve, we discover the mind of Christ. Consider Paul's words: "The mind controlled by the sinful nature is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace" (Romans 8:5-6). "The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. For who knows a person's thoughts except that person's own spirit within?...Who has known the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ" (1 Corinthians 2).

I have discovered that when I observe my thoughts, replacing fearful ones with peaceful ones, my life is transformed. As I reflect on God's infinite love for me, I can better radiate that love to others. As I feel His love, I want to share His love through service and kindness, which is a wonderful way to experience peace of mind.








© Carol Brown

Finding Peace during Difficult Times

Everywhere we look lately there is trouble. We see innocent civilians killed and maimed in wars and civil unrest throughout the world. Earthquakes, tsunamis, hurricanes, and tornados are destroying lives, homes, and cities. It is easy to become discouraged, and even depressed, as we see the devastation throughout the world.

As we grieve for the many millions who suffer, starve, or die, we can find peace when we pray for them. Whenever we hear of a catastrophe, we can pray for the people who are suffering. We can ask God to comfort and bless them. We can pray for peace.

We can also do something to ease the suffering in the world. I like to donate to Kiva, where microloans are given to needy people so they can start a small business. When the loan is repaid, I lend the $25 to someone else. Before we donate, we need to make certain that the site is safe and that the money goes directly to those in need--and not to wealthy administrators of the organization.

In our church, we collect donations each week for women and children who flee abusive situations to go to shelters in our city. We gather toiletries, diapers, books, games, quilts, school supplies to bring comfort and love to the 2000 individuals who enter these shelters each year. Elderly women in our city also knit scarves and hats to place in the kits.

One young woman in our neighborhood recently spent four months in Ghana, caring for orphans, teaching sanitation and nutrition to villagers, and supplying a remote village with medical supplies. Her service made a huge difference in the lives of others and transformed her own life as well.

She writes, "From September to December I at the age of 20 took off a semester of school, and went to Ghana by myself to volunteer my time. I did not go with a program. While there I was able to teach all levels of health to the village of Antwikwaa. I fundraised back home, started a medical clinic in a village that has never had a single medical supply within its reaches. When I went to say goodbye to my village the chiefs voted, and had come to the decision to make me queen mother aka nana mckell. It was an entire day process of carrying me through the village, sacrificing whiskey to the gods, drumming, dancing, singing, speeches, and by far the most humbling amazing experience I could ever ask for. By far the best adventure of the year, and more particularly my life. It was not an ordinary adventure in that it changed me emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. I'm in close contact with the village, the medical clinic is running smoothly, and I hope to be back within the next couple years! "


Whether we do something big or small, every prayer we offer, every donation we make, and every act of service we give makes a difference. When millions of people in the world join together to love, serve, and care for one another, we will begin to turn suffering into peace.

Let us begin today.


© Carol Brown

Life's Peaceful Paradoxes

We experience peace and joy when we discover and practice life’s beautiful paradoxes:

• When we give, we receive.

• When we forgive, we are forgiven.

• When we love, we are loved.

• When we serve, we are served.

• When we show mercy, we receive mercy.

• When we give peace, we receive peace.

• When we show kindness, we experience kindness.

• When we give God our hearts, He gives us His heart filled with unspeakable love.

We always receive more than we give. Gratitude, generosity, and goodness are the keys to peace. Love is the path.

May you walk in the path of peace today.

© Carol Brown

Choose Love

Each moment of our lives, we either choose love or something else. When we choose love, we experience peace. We feel confident, serene, and happy. We recognize that as children of God, we are born to love. Love is our nature. Love is our mission. Love is our gift.

When we choose anything else, we may feel sad, bitter, angry, or apathetic. When we lose sight of love, we may succumb to self-pity, addictive behaviors, or selfishness. Although those habits may bring temporary pleasure, they will not give us permanent peace. Only love does that.
In a world filled with conflict and violence, it is possible to choose love. We do it by doing the following:

• Fill your heart with loving thoughts. Replace and eliminate those that are not. When a contentious, judgmental thought enters your mind, recognize it as a non-loving thought and refuse to entertain it.

• Surround yourself with loving friends, people who truly love God, themselves, and others. Our power to love others increases when we access the energy of people who love.

• Surrender to the power of God’s love. Spend time daily praying and meditating on His love. Ask Him to show you how to love yourself and others better. He will.

• Accept the fact that no one is perfect. Allow others to make mistakes just as you do. Celebrate the good in others, even those who seem unlovable, for those people are hungry for love.

• As you focus your thoughts on love, speak words of love and encouragement to others. Smile often. Allow yourself to become an instrument of God’s love.

• Become an active listener. When others are speaking, seek to understand them and edify them.

• Seek to serve as your energy and circumstances permit.

Prayer is the heart of love. Kind words are the expression of love. Compassionate service is the instrument of love. When we love others, that love returns to us multiplied. As we sow thoughts, words, and deeds of love, we reap a rich harvest of peace and joy.

Love gives purpose and meaning to our lives. Learning to love God completely and to love ourselves and others unconditionally is the secret to finding peace amid sorrow.

Love, some day, will heal the world.

Soren Kierkegaard said, “When one has once fully entered the realm of love, the world—no matter how how imperfect—becomes rich and beautiful; it consists solely of opportunities for love.”


© Carol Brown

"I Will Honor Christmas in My Heart and Try to Keep It All the Year"

Perhaps Charles Dickens understood the spirit of Christmas best. He realized that it is in giving, not getting, that we discover the true joy of the season. Consider some of his words in his classic story, A Christmas Carol and from his other writings.

•A repentant Scrooge says, "I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all Three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach."

"A loving heart is the truest wisdom."

"Charity begins at home, and justice begins next door."

"No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else."

"Reflect upon your present blessings of which every man has many - not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some."

"Subdue your appetites, my dears, and you've conquered human nature."

"We forge the chains we wear in life."

"No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another."

"We need never be ashamed of our tears."

"There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor."

"Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but - I hope - into a better shape."

"Remember!--It is Christianity to do good always--even to those who do evil to us. It is Christianity to love our neighbours as ourself, and to do to all men as we would have them do to us. It is Christianity to be gentle, merciful and forgiving, and to keep those qualities quiet in our own hearts... If we do this, and remember the life and lessons of Our Lord Jesus Christ, and try to act up to them, we may confidently hope that God will forgive us our sins and mistakes, and enable us to live and die in peace."


© Carol Brown

Creating Peace during the Twelve Days of Christmas

I love finding ways to make the twelve days of Christmas meaningful and peace-filled. Here are a few suggestions that can be adapted to your circumstances and completed in any way that feels comfortable to you. This year I can already completed most of these suggestions, and it has truly been a peace-filled season. As we focus of giving love instead of getting stuff, Christmas becomes a matter of the heart, an attitude that can permeate our lives each day of the year.

First day: Send an anonymous thank you note to someone in your family, at work, or in your neighborhood.

Second day: Leave a treat on the door on a widow or widower in your neighborhood.

Third day: Donate a toy to a needy child.

Fourth day: Donate some food to a Food Bank.

Fifth day: Share some gently used clothing with the homeless, the poor, or those who are abused.

Sixth day: Write a list of reasons you appreciate your spouse, brother, sister, mother, or father. Include the list in a Christmas card and send or give it to the person.

Seventh day: Reflect on the gifts and blessings that God has given you this year. Thank Him for each one of them.

Eighth day: Invite someone who is lonely to dinner, lunch, hot chocolate, for dessert, or to a free Christmas concert.

Ninth day: Read Luke 2 and reflect on God’s infinite love for you and for all of His children. Think of one way you can share His love with others and then do it.

Tenth day: Take a healthy treat to an elderly or shut-in person. Spend some time visiting with him or her.

Eleventh day: Do something kind for yourself. Take a warm bath or read something inspiration. Reflect upon the unique talents and gifts that God has given you.

Twelfth day: Today give yourself and others a priceless gift that bestows happiness, joy, and serenity to the giver: forgiveness. If you find it too difficult to forgive someone who has offended you, ask God to help you. He will. If you need time to forgive, allow yourself to process your emotions, but after you have done so, choose forgiveness, which frees you from the burden of bitterness.

May you discover that as we radiate Christlike love to ourselves and others during the holiday season, we experience the true spirit of Christmas, which is pure love.

© Carol Brown

Priceless Gifts that Cost Nothing

During the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, we can reflect on precious gifts that we can give ourselves and others are cost nothing but are priceless. Often, the best things in life are free. Although these presents aren't tied with ribbons or bows, they are more valuable that silver or gold.

• Spending quality time with a child

• Listening to an elderly person

• Visiting a lonely neighbor or someone you know who is ill or sad

• Forgiving an enemy

• Serving your spouse, roommate, or family member

• Sharing a talent

• Showing gratitude to others

• Demonstrating kindness to a stranger

• Offering encouragement to another

• Writing a cheerful note to someone you know

• Making a call to friends or relatives to see how they are doing

• Smiling to those you meet

• Turning away from sin and turning toward God’s perfect love

• Reflecting on God’s infinite love for each of his children, including yourself


As we celebrate Christmas this year, we may also consider what gifts we can give to the Savior, who gave us the greatest gift of all--His life. I love the words of Christina Rossetti:

What can I give Him,
Poor as I am?
If I were a shepherd
I would bring a lamb,
If I were a wise man
I would do my part,
Yet what I can I give Him,
Give my heart.

May your heart be filled with peace, gratitude and love during this season in which we remember the One who gives us everything that is good.

© Carol Brown

Speaking Up for Children

Peace comes into our hearts when we reach out to bless the children around us. Children have a trusting, sincere quality that invokes the best in us, that inspires us to love ourselves and others better. As we seek to serve the children in our communities, we will discover that they give us more than we ever give them. There is nothing more priceless than the love of a child.

The first African American woman admitted to the Mississippi state bar, Marian Wright Edelman cares so deeply about children that she founded the Children's Defense Fund. She has published her ideas in several books, including The Measure of Our Success: A Letter to My Children and Yours. She is a pioneer is speaking up for the rights of children that are often neglected in our cultures.

Consider some of her thoughts as they relate to enhancing your inner peace and joy:

• Service is the rent we pay to be living. It is the very purpose of life and not something you do in your spare time.

• If you don't like the way the world is, you change it. You have an obligation to change it. You just do it one step at a time.

• If we don't stand up for children, then we don't stand for much.

• I'm doing what I think I was put on this earth to do. And I'm really grateful to have something that I'm passionate about and that I think is profoundly important.

• You really can change the world if you care enough.

• Service is what life is all about.

• When I fight about what is going on in the neighborhood, or when I fight about what is happening to other people's children, I'm doing that because I want to leave a community and a world that is better than the one I found.

• Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night.

• I don't care what my children choose to do professionally, just as long as within their choices they understand they've got to give something back.

• If you as parents cut corners, your children will too. If you lie, they will too. If you spend all your money on yourselves and tithe no portion of it for charities, colleges, churches, synagogues, and civic causes, your children won't either. And if parents snicker at racial and gender jokes, another generation will pass on the poison adults still have not had the courage to snuff out.

• Being considerate of others will take you and your children further in life than any college or professional degree.

• You're not obligated to win. You're obligated to keep trying to do the best you can every day.

• We must not, in trying to think about how we can make a big difference, ignore the small daily differences we can make which, over time, add up to big differences that we often cannot foresee.

• When Jesus Christ asked little children to come to him, he didn't say only rich children, or White children, or children with two-parent families, or children who didn't have a mental or physical handicap. He said, "Let all children come unto me."


© Carol Brown

How to Find Peace

Life can be difficult. Those we love may lose their jobs. Family members may become chronically ill. Dear friends may suffer with cancer or other critical illnesses. Personal injuries may reduce our mobility. A daughter or son may be raped by a neighbor. Trusted friends may betray us. Those we love will eventually suffer and die.

Even though we--or those we love--may suffer, we can still experience peace. Here are a few ways that enhance our peace of mind even when times are tough. Note how these ideas begin with mindfulness or positive thinking.

Allow yourself time to feel your sorrow.
After you have sufficiently grieved, release your pain to a Higher Power.
Become aware of your thoughts.
Eliminate your toxic thoughts.
Count your blessings.
Focus on the positive.
Love yourself.
Smile more.
Enjoy the simple beauties of life.
Surrender your unsolvable problems to a Higher Power.
Serve someone.
Forgive someone.
Allow God to enfold you in the arms of His perfect love.

Changing our thoughts can change our lives. We can begin our journey one day at a time or one moment at a time.

May your find peace in the journey.


© Carol Brown

Valentines' Peace

Last week I told two of my granddaughters—Emma, 10, and Hailey, 7—that they could do anything they wanted: go to the aquarium, a movie, to our favorite shopping village, or out to dinner. They thought over the options and decided they wanted to make valentines for some shut-ins and deliver them. We had a peaceful, serene time serving others, and it brought us great joy.

For those without spouses—and sometimes even for those who do—Valentines Day may not bring them the joy that it could. Here are a few suggestions to enhance your peace during this holiday that celebrates love.

• Make or buy some cookies and give them anonymously to some of your widowed or single neighbors.

• Send some cards to your friends or loved ones who are going through challenging times.

• Write a loving note to someone who needs some kindness.

• Invite some lonely friends over for a potluck dinner or dessert. Play some games or just visit and enjoy one another’s company.

• Do a small act of service for a stranger.

• Take a casserole over to a new mother or elderly grandma.

• Share some sweet treats or a dollar-store stuffed animal with a child.

This holiday gives us countless opportunities to enhance our peace by reaching out with
love to some of our friends and neighbors who may be overlooked during this joyful holiday. One or two small acts of service can make a big difference in enhancing your peace during at this season and throughout the year.


© Carol Brown

The Healing Power of Love

Love is the most healing power in the universe. It can mend broken hearts, heal broken relationships, and bring peace to wounded spirits. In a world filled with contention, stress, and despair, we cannot love God, ourselves, or others too much.

Genuine love is not codependent, demanding, or critical. When we truly love, we forgive quickly, nurture willingly, and serve joyfully. Although love stretches our souls at times, it brings peace and comfort to our hearts.

We can do three simple things to bring loves healing power into our lives.

1. Ask God to fill your heart with love.

Take time to meditate each day. Breathe in God’s love, and breathe out your love for all of God’s creations. Breathe in God’s mercy, and breathe out forgiveness. Breathe in compassion, and breathe out loving kindness.

Please know that asking God to fill you with His love is a powerful request. Be prepared for God to give your some challenging opportunities to learn what unconditional love really feels like. Love will stretch your soul in ways that will test your patience and courage at times.

2. Ask God each morning whom He would have you serve.

He may want you to comfort a child, call a lonely friend, or visit a widow. He may want you to nurture yourself more fully so that you can better serve others. Seek to live so that He can direct you to those whom you can bless with your love.

3. Study the nature of God’s love.

God’s love is patient, kind, forgiving, merciful, long-suffering, gentle, meek, and enduring. His love reaches out to the poor, the sinner, the lonely, the sick, and the forgotten. As we love and serve others, we are truly loving and serving God. This is the miracle of love.

In a world where so many are selfish, greedy, and cruel, love becomes a beacon of hope to those who are hopeless. It offers solace to those who are grieving, comfort to those who mourn, and peace to those who overwhelmed with despair.

Ask God how you can learn to love as He loves. Let Him teach you how to better love yourself and others. Ask whom He would have you serve today.

Then listen. He will guide your paths in gentle and peaceful ways.



© Carol Brown

About giving and receiving

When life is difficult, it’s easy to focus on our trials and not on our blessings. This week I’ve learned that four people I love are dying with cancer, and I’ve needed time to grieve and pray. My husband’s brother, two of my dearest friends, and my half-brother are all suffering terribly right now. I’ve felt too sad to write until now.

Now, I’ve lost a number of loved ones to cancer (and other things) before—but not this many at one time. I am devastated. My girlfriend Diane (not Ford’s wife, but another Diane) has had ovarian cancer return with a vengeance, and she has two teen-age sons. Diane has been like a sister to me, and Ford is like a brother to me. It's SO hard to see them suffer, and also it’s also painful to see family members losing their battle with such a formidable foe.

The words of Peyton Conway March have comforted me, “There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life -- happiness, freedom, and peace of mind -- are always attained by giving them to someone else.”

This week I’ve had to reach deep down inside to find the strength to help others. It’s feels easier to grieve my own losses and forget the needs of others, but serving—even in small ways—has brought me peace. Writing emails has been a fun thing to do. Diane is on a respirator, but she loves to read emails. Visiting with Ford and his wife and been such a joy and a precious blessing. Praying for my friends and family members has been a privilege.

Amid all the sorrow and grief, my son David is starting to feel better after being very ill for five months. Thanks, Kaylana, for praying for my son. What a sweet gift you gave to me, a total stranger.

I love the Old Testament descriptions of God. In Genesis, He is referred to as Yahweh Jireh, meaning the Lord provides. In Exodus, He is called Yahweh Rophe or the Lord who heals. We may never experience physical healing in this life, but the Lord can comfort us and heal our broken hearts. Today, allow Him to comfort you. Allow yourself to receive the compassion that He feels for you personally. Mediate on His pure and perfect love and let Him encircle you in His arms.

© Carol Brown

Promote Peace

I just returned from a trip to South Carolina, and the people I met there impressed me. Whether I was in an elevator, restaurant, meeting, or tourist site, the locals were friendly, polite, and kind. They smiled often, spoke warmly, and lived hospitably. One stranger sitting next to me in church even hugged me when I stood up after the meeting. I felt loved and cherished there.

I don’t know how or when South Carolinians started a tradition of graciousness, but it’s worth emulating. Perhaps we could smile more, express appreciation more readily, or say a kind word to someone. Repeated small acts of kindness create a culture of humanity.

In South Carolina courtesy was contagious. I observed that the more friendly people were, the more friendly others became. Tourists and locals alike waved and nodded at one another. Total strangers greeted one another with warmth and respect.

My cousins, Hal and Bev, volunteered for four years in two countries, Samoa and the Ukraine. They delivered humanitarian supplies to hospitals and medical clinics, worked in the schools (my cousin, Hal, is a former superintendent of schools), and organized church activities. They loved the people in both countries, but commented that the Polynesian hospitality felt like pure love. The Samoans willingly shared all they had with family and strangers alike. They gave and received freely and laughed often. They lived happily.

The Ukraine people were generally kind and gracious as well. However, years of living in a Communist dictatorship left some feeling disenfranchised and fearful of others. Some lived in fear and isolation. Hal said, “I loved both cultures but wished I could bottle the Polynesian love and give it to the people of the Ukraine. It would be so healing for them.”

We create the culture in our homes. We can be isolating and critical or warm and welcoming. We can also influence the culture in our neighborhoods, churches, and communities. After becoming an unexpected community activist, I discovered that one person can make a big difference even in a large city. We can set a tone of decency, courtesy, and humanity in our communities by the laws we pass, the ordinances we sustain, and the people we elect. We can make a difference.

I like the song, “Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me.” Today, let peace begin with you. Do something that promotes peace. Take a plate of cookies or some fresh fruit to a shut-in. Call a neighbor. Make a pot of soup for someone who is ill.

I just finished cooking some homemade chicken noodle soup for a neighbor who’s had double knee replacements. I don’t know how much the family will enjoy the meal, but I hope they feel the love.


© Carol Brown

Seeing Jesus in Everyone

The more I learn about Jesus, the more I catch myself in my thinking. I realize that when I judge or reject another, I am rejecting Jesus. As I love and respect another, I am honoring Jesus.

Can we see beyond our weaknesses to see the Divine inside ourselves? Can we look beyond the outward appearance of another to see Jesus? Can we look at the elderly, the sick, and the despised as though they were Christ himself?

Mother Teresa said, "I see Jesus in every human being. I say to myself, this is hungry Jesus, I must feed him. This is sick Jesus. This one has leprosy or gangrene...I serve because I love Jesus."

In Matthew 25:31-46, Jesus describes the day when He will return and will separate the people of the earth as a shepherd divides the sheep from the goats. He says to those who loved and served others, "Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

"Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

"And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

Mother Teresa said, “I see God in every human being. When I wash the leper's wounds, I feel I am nursing the Lord himself. Is it not a beautiful experience?”

We see our lives not as a sacrifice but as a sacrament when we see Jesus in those we serve. In our culture, I would suggest that "the least of these" often include those who are poor, disabled, sick, or rejected. The Savior ministered to people whom many despised. He loved everyone--especially those in great need--but spoke harshly against those who were prideful and conceited.

When we assist those who are poor or sick, we are serving Jesus. When we visit one who suffers with a disabling mental illness, we visit Jesus. When we minister to the dying, we minister to Jesus. Our lives are profoundly changed—and blessed—when we see Jesus in everyone—especially those who are not always easy to love.

As we remember that every person is a beloved child of God, it becomes easier to love others. As we realize that we are all a part of one great family, we are no longer strangers. We no longer view people as rich and poor, black and white, worthy and unworthy but as magnificent creations of God. We feel a sense of inter-connectedness and interdependence. Mother Teresa said,” If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.”

© Carol Brown

Doors

Someone wrote:

Look back and thank God.

Look forward and trust God.

Look around and serve God.

Look within and find God.



Paul Galanti, POW survivor of Hanoi Hilton in Viet Nam, who suffered unspeakable torture, said: "If you wake up in the morning and the door has a handle on it that you can open, that's a good day."

Conscious Living

When we savor the present moment, we find peace. As we express gratitude for the past and trust that God for future, we can enjoy the journey. As children of God, we have the power to live happily even when we are experiencing trials. Remember Christ’s amazing promise, “These things I have spoken to you, that in me ye may have peace. In the world ye will have tribulation, but be of good cheer: I have overcome the world.”

For years I lived unconsciously. I brooded about past problems and worried about future ones (most of which never happened.) I was anxious and depressed a lot of the time because I wasn’t allowing myself to enjoy present happiness. Now, I’m not blaming myself. I did not know about the power of conscious living, but I do now, and my life is so much better.

Since I tend to be an over-achiever, in the past I took on way too many projects. I wanted to be the perfect wife, mother, daughter, homemaker, teacher, and volunteer and wore myself out trying to do everything perfectly. Today I try to be good rather than perfect—it’s such a big difference. I focus on loving relationships, which begins with loving myself. Some put themselves last on their to-do lists, yet if we aren’t nurturing and loving ourselves, we may lack the energy to love thers well.

Gay Hendricks in his book Conscious Living says we must answer two questions if we are to make the most of our gift of life: How do I live at peace with myself? And, how do I live in harmony with people around me? I’ve just started reading the book so I don’t know his conclusions, but know that living in peace with ourselves and in harmony with others creates personal power. God uses us in amazing ways when we align ourselves with His Spirit and His love.

Last week my friend who is on our city council asked me to speak at a large meeting in behalf of the children and taxpayers in our community. I did a lot of research and signed up to speak at the Truth in Taxation meeting. Since over two hundred people signed up to speak, I assumed my comments would go unnoticed. Not so! I appeared on the news, radio, Internet, and newspaper for days. My picture and words were all over the place. My friends say they heard my comments over and over on television and radio news reports for several days.

Now, I’m just an ordinary woman, but I was speaking up for children, teachers, parents, those on fixed incomes, and those who have lost jobs or are underemployed. Our school board was proposing a 40% tax increase, and I discovered that most of the money was going to a bloated bureaucracy. I spoke up respectfully but firmly, and people listened.

When we live in the present moment, God can use us to help others in the most unexpected ways. I care deeply about children and the poor, and God used me to speak up for both that night. The tax increase has been cut in half, and although that is still too high, my friends have thanked me for speaking up for them, and I am amazed that such a small speech made such a big difference.

As children of God, each of us can do great things by small acts of kindness and service. When we live in the present moment, we become instruments of peace and love, and God uses us to bless others. Conscious living allows us to make the most of our gift of life, to savor the moment, and to serve others well. It allows us to be still, and know that God loves us, that He is in control of the universe, and that He will make weak things become strong as we trust in Him.

© Carol Brown

The Secrets to a Happy Life

There are many self-help books, talk shows, and magazine articles that tell us how to find happiness. Some are helpful. Some are not. Some say if we get nipped and tucked, have a complete make-over, win the lottery, or make our first million dollars, we will be happy. Some say that if we indulge ourselves, buy more stuff, and seek immediate gratification for our personal desires, we’ll be happy.

The best self-help book written shows us the secret to happiness. It explains it simply and beautifully. It says: “…anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”

How do we lose our lives for Christ’s sake? We love Him. We serve others. We seek to walk in His footsteps. We yoke ourselves with our Savior, so that He can help us carry our burdens of pain, sorrow, or suffering. God does not ask us to carry our crosses alone. He waits to help us.
One of the heaviest crosses that we can bear is feeling unworthy of God’s love or of the love of others. Remind yourself each day that you are beautifully and wonderfully made, that you are a child of God created in His image. Remember that He loves you infinitely and that you have infinite potential. You are loved!

As we seek to lose our lives for Christ’ sake, He will help us accomplish miracles. When I try to give my life to Him, He gives me power to do things that I could not naturally do. I can now speak comfortably before hundreds of people, trusting that God will give me the right words to say. Because I have given my life to God, He has used me in countless unexpected and wonderful ways.

I am a simple person with many weaknesses, but God has used my strengths as I serve others and has turned some of my weaknesses into strengths. I’m still learning and still growing, but I know I’m most happy when I lose my life it serving others. That is pure bliss!

Losing our life for Christ does not have to be difficult. Last week I took some fresh cherries to some shut-ins. They were thrilled! They hugged me, thanked me, and then called to thank me again a few days later. I expected nothing for my service, but was blessed with pure happiness for such a simple act.

Now, I’m not saying to become a martyr or a slave to other’s demands. We need to love ourselves as much as we love others, and we need to take good care of ourselves. And, we need to be grateful. Remember the words of the hymn:

Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings; ev’ry doubt will fly,
And you will be singing as the days go by.

In the Psalms, we read, “…happy is that people, whose God is the LORD.” ““Happy is he that hath the God of Jacob for his help, whose hope is in the LORD his God.” “Whoso trusteth in the LORD, happy is he.”

Gratitude, service, and love promote peace and happiness. A prayer of thanksgiving, an act of service, remembering God’s love for us—these simple acts can produce profound results. They are the secrets to a happy life.

© Carol Brown

The Joy of Giving

My mother, who died ten years ago, had a giving heart and is one of the most joyful persons I’ve known. Although she lived on $480 a month at the time she died, she was continually giving of her resources, time and talents. And she was so happy doing it.

Self-sufficient, she gave ten percent of her income to her church, paid all of her bills, and then thought of loving ways to give to others. When she was 84, she took food to an elderly widow who had buried both of her single children. Mother walked to the grocery store, bought the food, carried it across icy sidewalks and streets in a small, two-wheeled cart, and then placed in on her neighbors shelves. And she did this for months.

When a young mother, Marilyn, who lived down the street from my mother, became severely depressed after several long-term miscarriages and after losing a baby at birth, mother took her neighbor in, cooked for her, and cared for her until we were able to persuade Marilyn to get the in-house mental health treatment she needed.

Now totally well, this woman is the mother of eight beautiful children and a member of her city council. She became one of my mom’s dearest friends. My mom was in her eighties, had serious health problems, including congestive heart failure and a seriously injured back when she helped Marilyn, but when I saw Mom caring for Marilyn with such gentleness and love, I knew God was working through Mom to serve one of his precious children.

I just returned home after running some errands with my older daughter. She has five children and a busy life, but she stopped at a bank to deposit some money into her friend’s checking account. Her friend’s husband is unable to work and she has six children, including a disabled son, so my daughter wanted to help anonymously. What joy!

When my husband was a leader in our church congregation, he played Santa every year. He dressed up in a Santa suit and took food and supplies to families to needed help at Christmas. Oh, that was so fun! Some of the people asked over and over, “Now, who are you really?”

Our family likes to find a family or two with great need and help them out at Christmas. I find it's more gratifying to give something to the poor than to receive a gift at Christmas. Giving to me is the essence of the holiday. (I’ve begged my children to use the money they would spent on their dad and I to help the poor during the holidays; some are more obedient than others.)
One year my younger daughter asked our family--her three siblings and my husband and I--to help three pre-screened immigrant families for Christmas. Oh, that was so fun! One of the families had no money for a Christmas tree (or furniture), and to watch those little children when we put up the tree and placed the wrapped presents under it—oh, there just aren’t words to describe the joy!

I love helping out struggling souls in third-world countries through Kiva. For a $25 microloan, you can transform a life, and when the loan is repaid, then you can reloan it to another person you choose. It is so easy to do and so much fun!!

There are so many people needing a helping hand right now. Sometimes a phone call, a visit, a casserole, or an invitation to lunch can brighten their entire month. No matter how poor or rich we may be, it truly is more blessed—and joyful—to give than to receive. And, no matter how much we share, we always seem to receive so much more than we give.

© Carol Brown